A friend and a sister ( in more ways than one) Vanessa A Harris., asked me to contribute a post for her newsletter awhile ago. While I can’t post or link directly to that article, I have her permission to post my original. If you want to connect with her or receive her newsletters head on over to her blog, Vine Life Faith and subscribe 😉 Vanessa asked me to write about a God-moment/ situation in my life and I decided to share that with you this week as well. The style of writing for this post may be different from my usual ones because I’m trying out different ones. If it doesn’t work I’ll go back to the way I normally write 🙂
I’ve been married for 8 years. I’ve stayed home all that time while my husband worked crazy long hours. So what’s new now? Why do I say God’s called me to stay home? In the last couple of years, God had been working on me , to be content, to be joyful where He’s asked me to be.
That He’s made very clear to me and to others for me, is to be home. To raise my children. To realise my sphere of ministry is limited to 3 people. And I’m to be content with that.
In my natural state, I hate it! I’m an extrovert. I am re -charged being among people. I like to be involved in something that shows results. I want to be known. I want people to notice me. I want people to miss me. I want to be valued and cherished and needed by people.
But God. But My God.
He’s a Jealous One, He is. He wants to be my only Lover. He wants all of me. He wants me to find myself in Him. He wants me to realise that the Only Person whose approval I should be seeking is Him. And He deserves it. All of that and more. Because He gave me more than I could imagine or ask for. He loves me with a passion that has no end.
So how did He tell me?
Last June we moved to this city for my husband’s job ( he’s a specialist doctor with the resulting long hours, also we’ve moved every 3 years for his job). To make friends and meet new people , I went to a ladies lunch at a local church. Our table was full, and out of the 8 people there that day, Monica and Karen impacted my life in a “God-has-done-this” way. Only God . He make sure He got my attention, and I knew it couldn’t be a coincidence.
Monica told me at the Holy Spirit’s prompting that she felt very strongly, that this year I should NOT get involved in any ministry at church. ( The 6 years prior, that we had lived in 2 different states and attended 2 different churches, I was actively involved in the Children’s and the Women’s Ministries. I attended as many Bible studies as I could and I served in Sunday School as often as they wanted me. That to me was my validation and my identity). What Monica had to say to me, I did not like! But I did listen and I am very grateful I did. Right now Monica is a very dear mentor and we meet as frequently as we can, in my home around my chaotic schedule, to learn the Bible and to mature together.
You know our younger son was diagnosed with Autism 2 years ago now, and last year we needed to re-start his ABA therapy after dis-continuing it because of the move. My husband and I decided to give priority to his therapy for at least 2 years. Because I stayed home, and wasn’t committed anywhere on a daily or weekly basis, I could easily accommodate re-scheduled sessions for my son. ( We’re up to 30 hours of therapy/ week for my son, so that’s 30+ hours/ week that I need to stay home.)
In December of last year, nearly 6-8 months after being joyfully – content in my role as a SAHM, I saw incredible results in my son. He made more eye contact, he was affectionate and asked us for affection, he could make some wants known, he followed some directions, he had lesser (and easier to handle) meltdowns, and one Sunday at church I was overwhelmed with His Goodness and His Faithfulness. He had never left my side ( or my family’s) and He loved ( and still does) my son more than my husband and I ever will.
After meeting Karen last June, we texted occasionally and sought to meet, but things did not work out until April of this year. She had moved to a different state (her husband is an army Chaplin), they had come back for a short time as he had training and she had come to visit her family since she was 5 months pregnant with their first child. We met one Sunday at church, when my husband was on call, and hers was at the training camp. I debated telling her about my son, and then something inside me made me tell her about the Autism. Turns out she worked as the same kind of behavioral therapist that works with my son. She told me that children who had their parent/s stay with them during sessions made more progress and quickly too compared to those who didn’t. This was a healing balm to me, and just the edifying encouragement I needed at that time. Karen since has gone back with her husband and her baby is due any day now.
I did not expect to still be at home raising my kids 8 years into our marriage. I expected that once my husband’s hours were less chaotic, I would go back into the work force. I thought that would have happened 3 years ago. But God has other plans for me. He is teaching me to wholly depend on Him to be my identity, my validation, my reason for being. He’s teaching me to love my husband passionately, to be patient with my children, to kindly discipline them and to be present in the daily minutiae with my family. He’s seeing everything I do, even when I don’t feel like what I do has any value.
I want to encourage you to be faithful to Him. Whatever He has called you to do. Whatever He shows you. Leave it in His Hands and watch the wonder as He leads you down the path that only you can travel. What’s been asked of me may not ( probably will not ) be asked of you.
- You may need to stay at home.
- You may need to be a worker and a bread winner.
- You may need to be single.
- You may be married.
- You may need to stay in a marriage to Honour Him.
- You may need to leave a marriage and be a single parent.
- You may need to take part in active ministry.
- You may need to be faithful in the background.
- You may be called to be known and famous.
- You may be seen only by Him.
Wherever you are placed, you are known, you are loved, you are wanted, you are cherished. By The One who made you and knows you intimately. By The One who loved you so much He died for you, and rose again. If you are known by and know This Father, I look forward to seeing you, my friend, in Heaven. If you don’t know Him, please come to Him before it’s too late. He’s waiting for you with arms opened wide.
Colossians 1:1-2 (You are a special messenger , personally chosen to represent Christ. No one else can do what you are called to do.)
Paul, an apostle (special messenger, personally chosen representative) of Christ Jesus (the Messiah, the Anointed) by the will of God, and Timothy our brother, 2 To the saints and faithful believers in Christ [who are] at Colossae: Grace to you and peace [inner calm and spiritual well-being] from God our Father.
See you next week,